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Work and Word Problems

Let's say that there's a workplace. In this workplace there's a boss [x], a diligent, hardworking employee [a], a receptionist [b], and the boss' son [c]. [C] got married and went on his two week honeymoon. [A] fills in for [c], and since [x] needs to be supported (administratively, that is&#41 at ALL times, [b] will fill in for [a] (and sit at her desk&#41, which makes [a] REALLY mad. You see, [a] is VERY protective of her space and her e-mail and her computer files, and doesn't like her phone to smell like other people's perfume. She doesn't want other people's lipstick on her phone receiver, and she doesn't like other people eating her candy without asking first. She doesn't like other people throwing away her red plastic SOLO water cup, and she certainly doesn't want other people rearranging her desk! And lastly, she doesn't like other people asking stupid questions about Windows and the computer and, like, how to copy a file onto a disk. GOOD LORD, it is1998! Can you guess who [a] is?!       

Posted in Scowls.

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By Janet – July 1, 1998

Archived Smirk

Time for a geeky sort of smirk this morning! Administrating this site has become immensely more enjoyable, now that we have moved our servers from WENET.net to Best.com! This morning, I needed a set of traceroutes completed by their tech support department to confirm that the DNS ownership for "scowl.nu" was moved over… and they took care of it, with a smile in their voice (which is quite difficult to muster at 7:30am&#41. Like I said, this is a VERY geeky smirk, but it's a smirk anyway.

Posted in Smirks.

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By Avery – July 1, 1998

An Introduction

Now, before anyone gets the wrong idea, we are barflys, not drunks. There
is a real difference. Drunks just go out to bars with the specific intent
to get drunk on a regular basis. Barflys (like us) tend to go to bars a lot,
but mostly because we’re friends with the bartenders, or because we are getting
together with the locals, or because it’s just more fun to have a beer out
at the local bar, than sitting at home.

Since we have moved to San Francisco, we have spent many hours at our
local bar, the Toronado. The Toronado is a unique little beerhall. Feel free
to click on the links below to learn about the bar, the people, and what
we drink while we are there.

The Toronado is a beer bar located in San Francisco’s Lower Haight District.
The Lower Haight is an eclectic neighborhood, full of twenty-somethings that
have decided to shun the corporate lifestyle and just be who they are. Most
people here are tattooed, pierced or just sporting multi-colored hair. Even
if they aren’t, their friends or roommates probably are.

The Toronado has been written up in every major beer magazine as one of the
best beer bars in the world. Their Barleywine and Belgian Beer festivals
are the sort of events that are legendary in the beer community…. and drinking
these beers are the sort of rough-and-tumble people who love it. Right after
work, you’ll find locals in suits sitting next to locals in leather and chains
– all the time chatting about the complexity of some fruity Belgian beer.
It’s the perfect local dive.

The block that the Toronado is on has a number of other bars and restaurants.
Places that we will mention in the chronicles are:

Bars:
Mad Dog In The Fog – Half-full of locals, half full of yuppies. The Toronado
just whipped Mad Dog’s ass in softball, giving the Toronado bragging rights
for a year.

Restaurants:
Ali Baba’s Cave – Owned and run by Hussein Dawah, one of the nicest people
that we have met in San Francisco. Ali Baba’s serves a sandwich called a
schwerma: spit-roasted turkey or lamb with hummos, hot sauce, potatoes,
eggplant, cucumbers and yoghurt, all rolled up in a piece of lavash flatbread.

Rosamunde – A sausage
shop run by Jeff (Smiiley) Howard. Avery designed the menus and website for
Rosamunde.

Posted in The Barfly Chronicles.

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By Avery – July 1, 1998

Willie Brown – Compassionate Politician or Media Putz?

Bonus Topic!
Willie Brown – Compassionate Politician or Media Putz?

 

Avery

Janet

Well, another pride parade has come and gone. Why does the Pride Parade get my goat to the point that I have to write a whole Topic of the Week about this event?

First, my Saturday was ruined by the tourists who came into the Toronado on Saturday night asking for bottles of Corona.

Then my Sunday was ruined by MUNI's inability to gauge how many people were going to be waiting for a bus after the parade ended.

But at least I was able to spend five hours Sunday morning watching WB 20's coverage of what can only be considered the tackiest parade on Earth.

Now before everyone writes to me about what it's like being an oppressed minority.. let me cut you off right now. I happen to be Jewish. Have you ever seen a Jewish Pride parade with people dressed in chaps with nipple rings?

My problem with the parade has noting to do with the fact that the people marching were gay… hell, most of my friends are gay… and guess what! All of them think that the parade is a farce. If a bunch of White Anglo-Saxon Protestants decided to walk around naked screaming "WASP PRIDE" while sucking on oversized lollipops… we'd all think that they were out of their collective minds.

You don't get equality or respect by marching around dressed like barbie (male or female&#41… you get ridiculed.

Which, talking about public ridicule – can you believe what Willie Brown was wearing? He had on the most god-awful, ugly-ass rainbow striped shirt with a disgusting bright royal blue fedora. Was Willie trying to show respect to the marching masses, or was he in his own little way making fun of all of the people that he is bound to represent?

Like the answer to how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop… the world may never know.

Since this is a bonus topic, I feel a big bout of procrastination coming on!

 Let me just say, though, that Willie Brown didn't get my vote in the last election for San Francisco Mayor, and he won't get it next time, either.  I think it was his attitude towards the terrible public transportation situation that clinched it for me.

Willie doesn't think that those of us without cars should be upset about the fact that buses and trains don't run on time.  We should "just deal with" the fact that we have to set aside an hour to go 20 minutes away. What does he know?  He has a limo.  

Everything that he does, he does to further polish his sparkly image.  What other mayor (or actor, for that matter&#41 would appear on "Suddenly Susan" for god's sake?  I hear he's in some movies too, and People magazine. At this point, his famous hats probably have their own personalities, and for all we know maybe even their own political offices!    

Posted in Topics of the Week (1990s).

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By Admin – June 30, 1998

Personal Space, Please!

Personal space, anyone? Why do strangers feel the need to stand or sit so close to you on the bus that they are actually touching you? And what is wrong with those people who try to squeeze their two-foot body into a six-inch space at the bar, and then LEAN on you for the rest of the night, as if you were a pillar or something? The most frustrating thing of all is the fact that it doesn't seem to bother THEM at all. Yuck.

Posted in Scowls.

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By Avery – June 28, 1998

Archived Smirk

The Brian Setzer Orchestra released their latest CD!  If you look at the "upcoming concerts" section of the paper, it  appears as though Mr. Setzer decided to bypass San Francisco for Santa Rosa, but NO! He will play not one, but TWO concerts in SF. YAY! His tattoos and platform sneakers make me swoon. 

Posted in Smirks.

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By Janet – June 28, 1998