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Archived Observation

While Janet and I were attending West Virginia University, I started my fashion faux-pas list. This list chronicled every bad outfit and fashion statement that I saw during my year-and-a-half in Morgantown. By the time we left for Boston, the list ran over 100 entries long.

Not surprisingly, when we moved to Boston, it wasn't that much better. Luckily, six months of deep-freeze winter made for a half-year long fashion hiatus. Sure, people were probably wearing something tacky under their parkas, snow-pants, scarves and gloves, but it provided a needed respite from adding entry-after-entry to the list.

I figured that when we moved to California that the fashion sense would be better. It isn't. To punctuate this lack of fashion savvy, as Carlos and I were sitting at an outside table while drinking our Double Cappuccinos at Torrefazione Italia, I made my first official entry to what will surely become the San Francisco 1999 Fashion Faux-Pas List:

4-23-99: Battery and California Street, outside of Torrefazione Italia
While Carlos and I were enjoying a double cappuccino this afternoon, I noticed one of the most annoying fashion trends. The damndest thing is that it pops up all across the country on the first warm day of the year. The offense? Women who wear short skirts, nude pantyhose and open-toed sandals.

I can only assume that when people put this outfit together, they are trying to go for this first day of spring look, but they're worried that it might be too cool out to go outside without something to provide some extra protection for their legs.

Obviously, their mirrors only go down to their knees, because the visible stocking-seam running across their toes (which makes those little piggies look like a pack of sausages) just makes me cringe.

So come on ladies, if it's not warm enough to go without hose, leave the sandals at home.

Posted in Observations.

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